Posts by Open mind

Sometime this academic year, school related activities will bring at least myself and one of my teens into each of your areas. Hopefully, if schedules allow, the whole family.

When I find out the exact dates, I'll pm you.

Take care,

om

15

DA'd youth... How did your parents respond?

by bottleofwater in

i'm wondering how any of your parents responded when you disassociated yourself with a letter.. should i do so?

i'm wondering how my parents will react since i'm moving in with my uncle just in time..

Open mind

bottleofwater:

"I've been offered a job at Pret A Manger in Manhattan. Should I go to the interview?"

I discount about 99% of what's in the Bible, but here's a kernel of corn you might want to consider:

"Each one will carry his own load."

You're very new here so we really don't have much of a clue about your circumstances, background, personality, etc.

For example, when you said you were moving in with your uncle, I thought "sweet", you've got some breathing room.

Now you tell us it's only for a week. The pressure of making ends meet in this economy especially as a young person should not be underestimated. On the flip side, we don't know how crazy-making your home situation is.

Share a bit more and perhaps we can offer some more advice worth the full 2 cents.

om

32

Farkel and Leolaia ...

by snowbird in

jw
friends

.

eom.. syl.

Open mind

Thanks Farkel & Leo for all you've done.

If our family is ever in either or your areas, it would be an honor to take you to lunch/dinner.

All the best,

om

88

a reasonable question to any elder/members

by bigmac in

jw
friends

the question is this;.

because you are members of this apostate site, yet are still willing to serve the wt soc as elders,.

do you still hope to .

Open mind

Keeping my elder hat for as long as it took to awaken my immediate family was an integral part of a plan that worked for us.

I took the advice of Jim Whitney, aka "Amazing", mentioned earlier in this thread.

http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/183916/1/For-Active-JW-Men-Ideas-on-Awakening-Your-JW-Spouse-Long-post

To each his own.

om

15

DA'd youth... How did your parents respond?

by bottleofwater in

i'm wondering how any of your parents responded when you disassociated yourself with a letter.. should i do so?

i'm wondering how my parents will react since i'm moving in with my uncle just in time..

Open mind

In a previous thread bottleofwater revealed, if I remember correctly, that he is 18, baptized, regular pioneer, and let's see, there was one other inconsequential detail. What was it?

Oh yeah, he happens to be gay.

It's his idea to move in with his uncle and get away from his parents. (Dad is COBOE.)

How'd I do bottleofwater?

om

84

DF'd and struggling....LONG POST........my story.

by confuzzled777 in

how do i make a long story short?

i am fully aware that if anyone in my area were to read this that they will know who i am.

i was disfellowshipped on january 28th 2010 after an "interview" about an evening of bowling with friends and family back in november 2009. i was among 4 who were disfellowshipped and 6 who were publicly reproved.

Open mind

Welcome to JWN Confuzzled.

Sorry your arrival here is under such painful circumstances.

I'm a former elder, 3rd generation JW, now almost "inactive" along with my JW wife and unbaptized teen children.

My heart was aching for you as I read your account. Having been one of the three men in suits on more occasions than I care to remember, all I can say is, I'm sorry for the part I have played in this unjust, unscriptural "arrangement" and, for what it's worth, many elders can and do eventually see the light and at least step aside if not leave the Organization entirely.

Having said that, it might be helpful to you and others here to see things through the eyes of the Substitute CO who was on your JC. There's a very good chance that he is very strict and by the book since he hopes to make CO some day, am I right?

So, let me strap on my a**hole elder hat, and re-read your account through those eyes.

******************************

The reason they had a quick JC was because they had so many people to "process". They had a couple elders to "investigate" and as soon as they determine that your circumstances are "judicial", they pull in the 3rd kangaroo to move the assembly line along as fast as possible. This also helps limit the amount of cross-checking of stories the accused parties can do.

If you were the last folks they investigated, that's not good for you, as you now know. They wanted to get as much dirt on you from as many sources as possible.

2 elders from other congregations may have been selected so that they could avoid any appearance of favoritism either with you guys or others who were interviewed. Another possibility, is that your own elders weren't up to the task of investigating 20 people. Just speculating here.

Your Facebook account. Did you actually delete the photos when you heard about the investigations? If so, it looks like you're trying to hide something. Another strike against being "repentant".

Your DH went in to the JC first. More bad news. They wanted to get as much dirt on you as possible.

7 drinks in 7 hours. There are varying opinions on this one. Being a bit of a drinker myself, I was always fine with 1 drink per hour. But I never advertized it in JW land. There are plenty of elders who would think that's WAY too much even though the Department of Motor Vehicles says it's OK. Go figure. Personal opinions. Imperfect man standing in judgement. Don't get me started.

Throwing up. For some reason, this seems like it's always a slam dunk that someone was in fact drunk. (I've served on 3 JCs where drunkenness was at least one of the "sins".) There's no medical evidence to support this idea to my knowledge.

You admitted to at least 3 and possibly 4 times of throwing up after drinking. That could be interepreted as a "hardened, practice of sin" by the ladder climbing Substitute CO. As a practical matter, most JCs view 3 times as the max for any given sin. That's just my personal opinion, it's not in writing anywhere. We did have one Elder School where the instructor was berating a JC who wanted to "err on the side of mercy" and forgave some guy who committed fornication 4 times. "FOUR TIMES BROTHERS?!? FOUR TIMES?!?" I'll never forget that. He never actually said it, but the message was pretty clear to me: Three strikes (at the most) and you're out.

Drunkenness that a person confesses to can be winked away if it's private and no one knows about it. It sounds like yours were more known.

You left the room of the JC. ( I know your were crushed and upset and that's TOTALLY understandable.) To the Sub-CO it may have been disrespectful. YOU are the one who left the room and the earthly representatives of The Most High God without permission, it's YOU who should be apologizing to THEM, not the other way around!

******************************

(Removing Pharisee Hat)

I've seen plenty of elders with the above-referenced attitudes on JC's before. Usually, there was only one, and the other two of us could at least try to make an unjust, screwed up, imperfect system at least a little bit more loving.

Again, I'm so sorry you were put through all that and I hope you take the time to educate yourself about this religion. There's a wealth of information on this site and others.

May you find peace,

Open Mind

208

...Weird Ass Lights in the Sky...

by OUTLAW in

jw
friends

good evening jwn!!...

as most of you know i live in a forest,in the mountains..at night there is very little light pollution... so the sky is one big theatre screen... i see shooting stars,northern lights,satellites,planes on a destination..it`s all very beautiful... tonight was different... .

tonight there was something in the sky that defied anything i`ve ever seen... it had multiple aircraft lights but not like regular airplane lights..it wasn`t a helicopter... it could go straight up or down... move in one direction then head in another..it could do all kinds of weird stuff... sometimes it just hovered..then start doing all these weird maneuvers... regular aircraft is going somewhere,it`s headed in a direction..not this thing... i watched a regular airplane pass it... .

Open mind

OUTLAW said:

It could go straight up or down..

Move in one direction then head in another..It could do all kinds of weird stuff..

Sometimes it just hovered..Then start doing all these weird maneuvers..

Sounds like Jehovah's Celestial Chariot has finally tracked you down. Repent!!!

You also said:

"Sober as a Judge tonight.."

I can't believe 5 pages of ex-JW commentary have let that one slip by without a peep.

Are you sure you and the ghost of Da Judge weren't matching each other drink for drink?

(Hope you don't mind if I borrow your pooch for a sec.)

...................... ...om

43

When Elder's Fade

by zack in

jw
friends

as a publisher, still buying the wt line that they were god's sole channel and any problems, doubts, etc... i had were all a product of my own lack of.

wisdom and or humility or failure of application, i would be shocked and puzzled at how long-time elders would resign and then fade away.

i would wonder: what could have happened.

Open mind

I voluntarily "stepped aside" as an elder within the last 12-18 months.

"Brothers, I really need to spend this critical time in my children's lives focusing on my family."

Of course they tried talking me out of it and had, at my request, removed almost all of my Elder load about a year prior to my final resignation.

Several individual elders were very supportive and complimentary to me one on one.

As for the announcement read to the Congregation?

"Brother OM has been DELETED as an Elder."

Very "form letterish" as Undercover's comment indicated.

Same language is used for MS or RP: DELETED.

No indication is given as to whether it was voluntary or whether the person announced is a repentant drug-taking, adulterating, child molestor.

The JW gossip mill often takes over from there. Sometimes accurate, most times not.

Your mileage may vary.

om